Friday, March 27, 2009

Dumb ass warning labels

I’m sitting here eating a “naco taco” (redneck version of ceviche, canned tuna on a chipotle tostado) and wondering what the hell is wrong with my fellow homo sapiens.

Written on the side of my Wal-Mart brand tuna (hey, we’re in a fucking recession – fuck you Charlie!) is the following warning “Allergy warning: Contains Tuna”. Why???? Is it really possible that someone could win a lawsuit against Wal-Mart after they ate the contents of a can label “Chunk Light Tuna in Water” with pictures of minced fish on it?

I’ve seen this on cans of peanuts too. Almond Joy says “May have been made with machinery that processes nuts” To hell with the machines, what about the name of this product make lawyers think that information is worth using up ink for?

I say let natural selection take effect here. Anyone who knows they have a peanut allergy and opens up a can of Skippy and makes themselves a PBJ is probably going to improve the gene pool with their absence.

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